The KAB - Kailaria's Actual Blog

The Post-OBX IFPA Saga continues: Banned from PAPA 23

Hey folks,

I want to get my entire side of this IFPA saga out. Even if you know a fair number of the story bits from various victims' tellings and the handful of articles from around that time, I feel it's important to get everything since the only narrative that seems to be spread around these days is from the IFPA's/Andy's side of things, and I'll also have some of my own bits of commentary to provide as a trans woman who had only been playing competitive pinball for a little over a year (though I played pinball on & off throughout my life) at the start of this story.

We'll be starting with the OBX Incident in Nov. 2025 and the IFPA's inadequate response, fast forward to my protest attempt in February/March against the only readily available IFPA Director because he holds monthly tournaments open to the public, and then fast forward again to August when I registered for PAPA 23 and was summarily banned by the administrative team running the PAPA-branded event in September without any opportunity to appeal or bring my side of the story to light.

November 2025: The OBX Incident

Firstly, I was not there in the Outer Banks of North Carolina. I am, however, in the same Discord server as where things first started getting reported.

Based on reporting from the first day of OBX Flippers 2025, three trans women entered the women's bathroom a little before or after competition was set to begin. Two of them left, leaving the third, who I'll refer to as "B" in similar accordance with the NBC Out article, behind to finish up. At this point, the manager had gone into the bathroom and dragged B out and threatened her with having the police called.

B then reported to the Discord about the assault and having a panic attack. My friends then started rushing to the venue as soon as they could. At least one person went to console B while others started asking the TDs how they were going to protect trans people and requesting this manager be removed/replaced. The Women's Advisory Board member at the time who was on site tried advocating for B and the rest of the trans women who were there, and based on later reporting from tabloid "journalism" blog The Kineticist, she had been given carte blanche approval to shut down the event and tried to work with the TDs to address the issue with that possibility on the table.

However, hours passed. The manager refused to leave until the end of her shift at 3PM Eastern time, including managing the sign-up desk to handle all 15 or more of the refunds of my friends and acquaintances where she kept up what my friends considered a gloating/triumphant look, and scoffing at any pronouns that differed from her perceptions.

Kineticist reported that the moment that manager left was when the WAB member sent a message to the IFPA Slack stating that things had resolved. Given my own knowledge of the situation and having a somewhat similar mindset to the WAB member, the way I had read this message in the logs was that she was merely pointing out that the manager was no longer on site harassing trans women, not saying that the situation in its entirety had been resolved, despite how the rest of the IFPA took it.

My friends and acquaintances in the Discord were offered an extra couple hours to make up for the time that they couldn't safely play while the transphobic manager was there, but they declined due to that manager having sapped their enthusiasm for playing pinball in the OBX Flippers tournaments, and presumably because the owner didn't step in to have the manager removed, thus there was no telling whether a repeat occurrence might happen.

Those friends continued to spend the rest of the weekend mostly away from OBX Flippers to try to make up for the discrimination they experienced.

I was upset that somehow, pinball had already regressed a bit, but at this point in time, I still mostly felt assured that it was just this one location that happened to have a transphobic manager, an ambivalent owner, and a pair of TDs who didn't have the power to remove the transphobe, didn't console the assaulted victim, and only provided half-hearted offers for extra time that didn't take the full situation into account (amount wasn't enough, overlap with volunteer-only hours, or after folks had already received refunds).

November 2025: IFPA's OBX Decision, Kineticist, and IFPA Director Andy Bagwell

It wasn't until the Thursday after OBX Flippers ended – a full 6 days after the incident and 4 days after the event completed – before the IFPA finally made their announcement:

The Women's Advisory Board made it painfully clear that they did not agree with this decision immediately after it was posted.

However, despite that, the IFPA shut down all discussion of the matter, constantly stating that the matter is final and anyone bringing up the OBX Decision in posts where the IFPA has moderation powers (their Discord, their Facebook posts, and the IFPA website), it would result in suspensions, bans, deletions, and blocks from those places.

Over 1,000 signatures were gathered on a Change.org petition. Dozens of pinball groups, including many Belles and Chimes Chapters, across at least the USA and Canada stopped hosting IFPA events. A handful of IFPA Women's Advisory Board members resigned early on, then right before the US Thanksgiving holiday, the remaining WAB members collectively resigned as a group.

In that time, The Kineticist was doing its own reporting of the OBX Incident. They posted three main articles:

  1. An article covering the initial reporting, mostly as told from the victims' points of view, and seemed mostly sympathetic to their plight.
  2. An article that covered the IFPA's OBX Decision the day of its posting, and seemed to me to be slightly on the IFPA's side with maybe a little sympathy towards the victims, but not nearly as much as the first article.
  3. An article less than a week later that to me felt heavily on the IFPA's side, including a foreword from IFPA Director Andy Bagwell that, in my and many of my friends' views, threw the Women's Advisory Board under the bus for not essentially "getting with the program". Additionally, all three of the top members of the IFPA – IFPA Director Andy Bagwell, IFPA Director Adam Becker, and IFPA President Josh Sharpe (as listed in the order given in this article) – had submitted a full slew of initially unredacted Slack screenshots from the IFPA's Slack server covering the dates from a few hours before the OBX Incident started through until the IFPA's OBX Decision was posted, plus a handful of messages afterwards containing the WAB's reactions to the IFPA's OBX Decision.
    • B's name was included among unredacted names in the Slack leak, as well as the on-site WAB member's name despite the WAB member having been receiving death threats in relation to the OBX Flippers tournaments, I guess because that area has some, I hope, small-ish number of very vocal transphobes..?
    • These names and I believe at most two others' names were later redacted after a number of private messages to the author of the article from various members of the victims and the on-site WAB member. B's name was redacted within minutes to an hour, other names weren't redacted for at least a day if not multiple days.

At this point, I was already feeling like injustices were being enacted upon my community, my friends, and my ability & safety to play. Granted, I live in Chicagoland/Illinois where protections are fairly strong and, for the most part, I am privileged and blend well enough that I don't even get misgendered except on very, very rare occasions.

However, IFPA Director Andy Bagwell shared this third article to his personal Facebook account, stating something to the effect of "here is the first time I'm publishing my official statement." I had "friended" Andy a few months prior, and thus was able to see his personal posts, not just his posts to the Pinball Super League Facebook Group. But his statement including the sentence "The women members of the staff were not willing to allow that blame to be laid at their feet as well," and a later sentence stating "We have received a ton of private support on our decision with OBX, from players of all genders, including the trans community," both strongly rubbed me the wrong way.

As such, since I wanted to try to reason with him and show how such decisions by the IFPA can lead to further hostility against trans folks down the line, but I also wanted to be clear with him that I did not support the OBX Decision, I responded with something to the effect of: "While you may have some private support from trans folks, do not count me among them." and somewhere in my response included the topic of "there's a difference between 'not being transphobic'/'not being racist' and 'being anti-transphobia/anti-racist'," with the understanding being "not being bigoted" merely means that you're not actively causing harm to a minority but are okay with whatever the status quo is, while "being anti-bigotry" is taking steps to make the status quo a safer one for the minority instead of merely neutrally not changing things or actively causing harm.

The reason I say "to the effect of" here is that this message was quickly deleted by Andy because he had received a huge swath of negative comments not long after making this Facebook post, and neither of us screenshotted it at the time before he blocked me entirely. I'm only aware of this fact because, through a third party, I found out that he claims he went "slightly overboard with blocking people" (paraphrased) and that my response "wasn't even as aggressive as some of the ones [Andy] was blocking".

Small aside: Injurious Injustice

In the immediate aftermath of the OBX Decision, I was feeling a large sense of injustice, which had me at a somewhat persistent level of seething/angered whenever I'd think about it or talk about it with the victims.

Also over that prior two months or so, I'd tripped over my dishwasher door in my kitchen when unlit twice (my sibling and I at the time had a habit of leaving it open if we hadn't finished unloading the clean dishes, which usually was just the utensils at that point).

Well, the Monday after the OBX Decision, I was walking into the unlit kitchen again while holding my glass water bottle in one hand, and my laptop with perched phone in the other arm. I tripped over the darn dishwasher door again. A third time! And this time, instead of merely stumbling and catching myself, I fell all the way to the ground.

I managed to save all of the things I was holding and took some bruises to my knee and hip. I wanted to get up, but my hands were rather full. However, this being the third time, and in my (possibly post-Covid-infection "enhanced") frustration with the IFPA, I needed a free hand and was so frustrated that I tried putting down my glass water bottle... either at the wrong angle, and/or with a fair bit too much force.

It was enough that even its rubber protective cover didn't protect it. It shattered.

At this point, I was surrounded by glass, my hand was wet, something I treasured that was part of my daily routine was destroyed, and I was in the dark on the ground. I screamed out crying.

My sibling was getting ready for bed, but thankfully not so bad that they were able to come see what I needed help with. They turned the light on.

There was blood spattered everywhere. My dominant pinky finger had been sliced by one of the shards.

I'll keep the rest of the details short here. I got to the ER, didn't get back home until 7 hours later with 3 stitches, and over the next month, was diligent with maintaining it, but still managed to play pinball where I did so with less vigor and nudging from that hand to prevent reinjury.

It hasn't healed to this day the way I would like, but it at least has retained the appropriate amount of flexibility. It has made playing piano (when I do; I don't play it as often as I used to) a bit more awkward 😓.

December 2025-January 2026: The silent protest (opt-outs/non-attendance)

Quickly: An opt-out used to be a thing instated by the IFPA as an olive branch to those who didn't want to pay the $1 IFPA fee for tournaments starting from the time that the IFPA started requesting those to help fund year-end States/Worlds tournaments' prize pools and administrative fees (which were a small percent of the $1) back in 2017. Most people over time stopped bothering opting out of tournaments or possibly even bothering with tournaments, leaving behind only folks who paid the fee.

When a player opted out, they did not owe the $1, their rating was not accounted for when calculating World Pinball Player Ranking points (WPPRs, often pronounced "whoppers"), and they would not gain any WPPRs for participating in the tournament. When submitting, the Tournament Director (TD) would remove the opted-out players, shift the rankings upward to fill the gaps, and report the rankings and other metadata from there. TDs were allowed to forbid opt-outs at their discretion.

Anyway, because Andy had blocked me, it was my opinion that he didn't want to talk to me, nor I with him given how much I felt like he was at best a disappointment to the pinball community if not complicit in allowing transphobia to gain more of a foothold in competitive pinball.

However, most of my and many of my friends' distrust in the IFPA was largely focused on IFPA Director Adam Becker – whom was listed in the leaked Slack thread from that third Kineticist article as the one who made the OBX Decision, both overall and as the author of the post on the IFPA website – and IFPA President Josh Sharpe – who folks within or formerly within the IFPA organization have essentially said "all decisions must go through/come from him; if you can't convince him to go with it, then they're a no go."

Even still, I stopped bothering to attend Andy's Pinball Super League tournaments to honor that block and especially because I had already heard from those who tried attending his own annual charity tournament in late November that "Andy does not honor opt-outs." Some of my friends even described the way he said it as "gloating"/"bragging" to at least some of those who attempted to opt-out. I also didn't attend any more of his ORD tournaments.

I did still attend the few tournaments at the time that went on unattached to the IFPA or, if not run by Andy, that allowed IFPA opt-outs. The December ORD final Sunday tournament ended up being run by other ORD members while Andy was away, so I entered and opted out of that one. Through the pinball grapevine, I heard that he seemed upset that one of his tournaments (since he still was the one who input them into the IFPA's WPPR system) had let someone (me) opt out.

Eventually, the Punk Rock Pinball Association (PRPA) had formed and Chicagoland started hosting its first PRPA-rated tournaments at the beginning of January. If a tournament still allowed IFPA opt-out while submitting to the IFPA (solely or jointly with PRPA), then I'd attend those too.

The only IFPA event I didn't opt out of was Illinois Women's States, where there was a lot of camaraderie, but it was also a fair bit somber because folks kept pondering how to try to break through with Andy and Josh with trying to reverse the OBX Decision or at least point out why people are continuing to be upset with the IFPA's decisions.

January capped off with the release of the NBC Out article, which covered the North Carolina scene, the aftermath of the OBX Incident and Decision, and whose journalist was the only person to have ever reached out to B for any sort of comment. Up until a month or two ago as of the time of writing this, B had never been in contact with any IFPA member because nobody even bothered to reach out to her. B had to reach out to them.

February 2026: Removal of opt-outs and protest planning

Early in February, the IFPA announced that they would be removing the ability for players to opt-out of IFPA-sanctioned tournaments starting in March.

I had already been brainstorming ideas for months as to how to get the attention of attention of Andy, any other IFPA director, and/or Josh to help make them understand that the choices they keep making are further ostracizing queer communities across the country. I ran it by a handful of folks at some tournaments I attended, and then because my day job is as a dues-paying union member in tech, I started writing up a Grievance Letter after laying out the plan for the in-person protest.

The Ideal in-person protest plan

The one that I latched onto was the idea of a peaceful protest, kind of like a sit-in or die-in protest I've seen from other types of protests since coming out as trans in 2015. However, since the goal was mostly to show how large of a group the people who opposed the OBX Decision and the Opt-Out removal policy, the overall amount of disruption was meant to be kept somewhat minimal.

Essentially, in an ideal world, what would've happened was:

  1. My protest group would've shown up and delivered the Grievance Letter to Andy and the attendees of the Pinball Super League (PSL) right before it would've started.
  2. Then, we would've began our own separate, group matchplay tournament, occupying however many machines turnout would've occupied at 4 players per game.
    • This overall would've brought the total number of pinball players at Enterrium up to close to what attendance used to be like before the IFPA kept doubling and quadrupling down, which had caused the PSL's attendance to drop something like 30-60% compared to each same month the year prior and never recovering towards the 80-100 people they used to draw in (even by August 2026).
    • Granted, the PSL events weren't bringing in as many extra machines to accommodate for large crowds like they used to, and many machines kept leaving Enterrium's main bank of games entirely every other week for a little while too.
  3. PSL would've started their tournament. They might have gotten randomized onto the same machine as one we would've been playing, where they could've either requested Andy to be switched to a different, open machine, or they might have just had to wait. During the wait, the inactive protest players could've chatted with the PSL players about why we would've been protesting, could've shown them and discussed the Grievance Letter, and otherwise could've forwarded any concerns to me.
  4. As protest groups would've finished their games, just like with any other group matchplay tournament, they would've then gathered around the TD/TO (me) to report scores, freeing up the machines for the PSL groups to play them. Once all protest groups would have finished, I would've had the software generate the next round and publish it like in step 2, with no preference for machine. Protest players would've waited patiently to play their next round until PSL players finished up in the same way PSL players would've waited for our players to finish up in step 3.
  5. All this time, I would not have been playing. As the main organizer, and the primary writer of the Grievance Letter, I would've been the one with the most succinct knowledge and understanding of why we would've been doing this protest, and would've been able to explain to any PSL folks that "we are doing this to raise awareness of what happened at OBX and what the IFPA could do to win us back with these 4 reasonable requests endorsed by the victims of the OBX Incident". I would've also been there to de-escalate if things got heated, and maybe even have an in-person discussion with Andy after everything.
  6. Everybody from the protest side of things would be there solely to play pinball and, if they would've decided to wear things with slogans, only including slogans and designs about inclusion, unity, and diversity, never anything directly antagonistic of the IFPA. We all just wanted to be able to play pinball, without feeling excluded in the same way as the OBX victims were not safely included at Flippers and ignored by the IFPA (except by the former WAB member that was onsite).

This entire effort would've been my final stand to try to communicate with the IFPA Directors and/or President. I wanted to show a sample of how big this coalition of aggrieved players is, and provide very reasonable requests that should've been easy to implement that still left the IFPA standing mostly by their prior decisions while addressing the concerns the IFPA allegedly had with various policies they decided to change, just in a fashion that is more player-centric.

Later, some of my friends would point out that the plan and organization of this protest resembled labor union actions such as a March on the Boss where aggrieved workers go to the boss's office and, as a group, lay out their concerns/issues without as much opportunity for singling them out or breaking them apart.

The Grievance Letter

I'll just link to the document here, but the summary of the 4 grievances and the reasonable requests to fix them are as follows:

  1. Grievance: Removal of opt-outs removes a simple form of protest against the IFPA
    • Resolution A: Re-allow opt-outs, but add conditions to prevent abuses by Pro-labeled (top 250 rated) players
    • Resolution B: Rename suppression to suspension, Rework suppression and reduce self-suppression penalties
    • (Bonus Resolution C): In addition to A or B, remove the points from OBX Flippers Open now that they aren't relevant since States and Worlds are locked in.
  2. Grievance: Silencing discussion about OBX has fomented dismissiveness of concerns surrounding any IFPA decision
    • Resolution: Formal 1:1 apology with the victims of OBX
  3. Grievance: No Dispute Resolution Process leads to "we examined ourselves and have decided we did nothing wrong"
    • Resolution: Create a formal Dispute Resolution process & committee that is separate from the Directors and President
  4. Grievance: Leaked chats which unfairly shifted blame and accountability to the former WAB
    • Resolution: Public apology to the former Women's Advisory Board members

This letter went through a number of edits, with reviews and suggestions from the OBX victims and some local friends. Together, we finished up the document in time for a week before Andy's March PSL tournament. It hasn't been changed since it was published.

Facebook event and things spiral out of control

I've never been to a protest before, let alone organized and led one. I also haven't even been to a Pride event! I knew some guidelines from watching threads and videos from social media surrounding some pride events, pro-democracy protests, and Black Lives Matter protests, but this would've been my first such thing.

As such, I almost immediately made numerous rookie errors. The very first thing I did when setting this up was I made it a Public FB Event. One of my friends asked if that's what I wanted to do, which made me second guess myself, so I deleted the public version maybe an hour after it had been up and made a Private one instead.

I set the location as Enterrium, selected the time & date, put the link to the Protest Strategy & Grievance Letter combined document in the description as well as a link to the Matchplay tournament, and went about inviting everyone who had shown interest in it from the Public one over to the Private one.

Some folks who were more vocal, and in some cases, more crass, joined the event. I reiterated that I wanted this to be peaceful and non-antagonistic of the IFPA, Andy, or Josh, and that the only disruption that should occur should be taking up space at pinball machines, playing 3-4 player games the same as the PSL would've, and delivering the Grievance Letter. While I had seen a handful of some of their posts having FB-Friended them because of this action, and in some cases, I disagreed with the methods they would go about their activism, their hearts were generally in the right place, and they all agreed to do things the way I wanted to do them and that I would gladly toss anyone from the protest who caused any problems.

I received a few private messages from folks who saw the public and the private events asking how much I wanted this publicized, so I clarified that "I began second guessing whether it should be public because Andy or the venue might see it and shut it down, so I made it private. But, share it with as many people you trust as you can because I want to show Andy (and Josh if he's there) the size of our coalition and how many people he's missing out on by being so stubborn."

However, my second guessing was slightly warranted, even though they both still ended up seeing it. On Thursday, I received a message from, to my surprise, Andy Bagwell. He had decided to unblock me to inform me that the GM had contacted him to inform him about the protest, that he was free within a 2 hour timespan from the time of sending the message, had spent some time Wednesday night reading the Grievance Letter, and also that Enterrium corporate had told the GM that if the protest goes through, the GM should pull the plug on all pinball tournaments indefinitely at Enterrium. Andy also mentioned being understanding if I didn't want to talk.

Truthfully, I was not really in the mood to take Andy for his word given how I felt about his statement to the Kineticist back in November and his block of me on Facebook. Given how much things were spiraling and I was stressing out, I thought "what if he's the one who even suggested Enterrium to take this course of action so that he can scapegoat me and my friends, and also start moving events over to the newest pinball location in town, The Pinball Capital, once it opens?"

And even if that stress-induced, exaggerated scenario wasn't anywhere remotely possible, what's to say Andy would've actually listened to what I had to say instead of just laughing it off like he had so many of his far closer friends over the previous 4 months, including a lawyer who occupationally is typically good at oral arguments? How would I – someone who sometimes stumbles or freezes up when I'm not prepared for arguing or making a case and don't have a response ready or especially on the fly – be able to convince Andy and the IFPA to enact even a single one of the requests in the Grievance Letter, especially having only been in competitive pinball for 1.3 years (at the time)???

With the knowledge at this point that somehow, there was information about things that I'd meant to keep hidden until the right point, I tested Facebook a bit while pondering a path forward and discovered one big thing about Private Events here: The event description is public information, even if you haven't been invited/accepted into the private event. Knowing that, I removed the Matchplay and Grievance Letter document links from the description and moved them to a separate, private post, before continuing with next steps.

Email to Enterrium GM

I still took the threat seriously enough to check sources. So, at the suggestion of my local confidants & friends, I instead reached out to the GM of Enterrium on Friday. My email shared more about the plans to try to assure them that there was no intention to interfere with Enterrium's business, their staff, or other patrons, and that we had no qualms with Enterrium itself.

I pointed to the online conversation that the GM might be aware of surrounding some of the IFPA's recent decisions, especially surrounding trans players' safety, and how those discussions have become difficult and unproductive due to most of them happening from behind keyboards. The goal was to repair fractured relationships in the pinball community by delivering the Grievance Letter to Andy, given that he's a Director of the IFPA and can have discussions with the other Directors and the President.

I also laid out that we just wanted to play pinball alongside the PSL, to showcase the size of pinball players who had been feeling excluded by the IFPA and the loss for the PSL and the IFPA that that represents. I assured the GM that there was no intent to be loud or even chant, and that I as the leader would actively discourage any protest participants from bringing anything with antagonistic slogans. They would also be advised to not argue directly with PSL players, only directing them to me or my TDs who could help de-escalate and explain our goals calmly.

I then appealed to the GM that many of us are even friends with PSL regulars, and so that we believe we can be respectful of everyone while expressing our disagreement with IFPA leadership's decisions. Our end goal was to play pinball as one big competitive community again, and that we were hoping an in-person action would communicate how much we care about being included and kept safe at IFPA events.

I finally assured the GM that this protest would be a one-time thing, that there would not be any further civil disobedience actions even if the IFPA continued to not truly listen & hear our pleas. This was a last-ditch effort to try to bridge the gap, and that if the IFPA's leadership continued to wall itself off, then the affected communities would have to fend for ourselves in the ways that worked best for us, albeit fractured and disappointed.

I left him off with being open to further discussion and answering of questions and a direct link to the Grievance Letter.

GM response

(Interspersed through the GM's response, I'll be providing some commentary in parentheses and italics like this)

On Saturday morning, the GM ended up confirming what Andy had told me, saying that it was corporate telling him to pull the plug, not even his own choice and that it's above his pay grade. He claimed that the first Tuesday of every month is for the monthly PSL tournament and that the games and space are reserved for them (not accounting for the significant reductions in attendance since the IFPA Decision in November, but maybe he wasn't aware of the numbers; also, the PSL didn't always enforce their reservation, often allowing non-PSL, casual customers to play on the machines, maybe only interrupting to make sure they don't start another game after they finish their current one).

He said that he was happy to work with my group to find another night that doesn't interrupt any of the many other groups that hold tournaments there, including Chicagoland Belles and the Enterrium Electronic Pinball league (which wouldn't help with raising the awareness I wanted surrounding the OBX Incident and Decision).

And then the GM said that while he appreciated that I informed him that it was meant to be a peaceful protest, he said that the "online rhetoric does not support that" (This made zero sense to me. What did the GM see to come to this conclusion besides being shown only Andy's perspective, and/or that the GM and Andy both [separately] thought that protests are only ever loud, in your face, and physical?).

He proceeded to explain his responsibilities to his guests and staff, how he was uncertain that this protest would not put them in harm's way (despite my assurances), and then requested that I cancel the planned protest at Enterrium. He expanded, "We are private property and any type of protest would not be allowed," and encouraged me to find a different way to handle my current situation with the IFPA outside of Enterrium's business (despite that all other avenues had failed, leaving me and my community feeling helpless, dismissed, and ignored).

The GM gave the ultimatum on "if you protest, the people I answer to have given [the direction to end their support for the pinball community and cancel all tournaments immediately]". And then, he left me off with one last statement: "I truly hope your differences between your community and the IFPA and the PSL can be resolved peacefully and promptly."

Andy the Ghost and Planning Strategy v2.0

Those final words, I took to heart, so I sent a message over to Andy after a bit. I was reluctant to do so, but some friends offered to be on the call to help me articulate my side if I start to clam up, so I included that option in my message asking to chat on Sunday.

However, I didn't receive a response until midday Sunday right as I was getting ready to go to a non-IFPA pinball tournament (since it was now March, so opt-outs were no longer possible). He said that he was busy at a personal event that weekend, and that Enterrium management had informed him to let them handle this situation at this point as "it's a potential safety issue".

Relying on my experience working in a unionized workplace (just as a dues-paying member, not in any aspect that handles grievances like being a Steward or in any way interacting with management), I responded:

If we have a chat, we can negotiate a way to call off the protest that is mutually beneficial to the players who've been hurt and to the IFPA. You've read the document, you already know our requests and possible remedies. Let's find something(s) small the IFPA is willing to achieve before Tuesday on that list that will satisfy us.

I later followed up with:

Also, management told me to work out our differences with IFPA & PSL, so I would appreciate not being ping-ponged back and forth.

Now granted, I'll admit that I could've phrased things better. Both were sent with very little review like the Grievance Letter and the Email to the GM had received. But time was of the essence, he had said in his first message that he had read the document, and I was a bit upset that Andy's actions portrayed that he thought that Enterrium's solution of "cancel your protest or we'll cancel pinball for everyone" was inevitable. It felt like my community was already an acceptable loss. I was worth talking to on Thursday, but not on Sunday? That continues to not make any sense to me even today.

So, I brainstormed with my friends while at the tournament and the OBX victims afterwards, and came up with some ideas that I took and crafted into Protest Strategy v2.0, linked here.

Andy never ended up sending me any more responses of any kind beyond his one "I'm busy" reply on this Sunday.

Version 2.0 summary

  1. The stakes: mentions everything above about how Andy contacted me about Enterrium threatening to pull the plug, how I contacted the GM, and the GM's response
    • This is because I'd been alluding to what the stakes were in vague terms to the FB Event in an attempt to ease concerns, so I needed to fully spell it out.
  2. Reason for strategy change: Here I mentioned Andy effectively ghosting me, and some key points from the GM's response about "holding two tournaments in the space" could guide how to keep the protest alive.
  3. Strategy 2.0:
    1. I cancel the separate tournament to hopefully ease Enterrium's main concern
    2. Attempt to join the PSL instead; enter more disjointed and as-we-arrive rather than as a huge group coming from the mall's food court
    3. Utilize malicious compliance instead of blocking the machines; sticking strictly to the rules up until the point where a warning would be or is given out, and otherwise playing mostly normally, possibly with less optimal strategies that are fairly safe and easily repeatable if skillful enough
    4. Start handing out the Grievance Letter around round 3 or 4.
    5. (An explanation of how this helps ease Enterrium's concerns, helps keep things more innocuous except specifically me, etc.)
  4. [Insert thing for those unwilling to join PSL for one reason or another]
  5. If Andy came to the table with concessions, backup plan to redirect elsewhere: hold effectively a celebratory tournament if we won some concessions and debrief
  6. If instead Enterrium beefed up security, redirect same as if we'd won concessions, but instead to protect as many folks from repercussions as possible

Version 2.0 and how it fizzled

When I posted this document to the Facebook group that Monday morning, I got at least a little bit of pushback:

  1. Some folks had a hard line against giving money to the IFPA, even in the name of protest. Some of them were already hesitant of playing in a tournament at Enterrium since they felt that the two were complicit or one-and-the-same (though I did not see the two entities this way), so v2.0 involving joining PSL was too far for them.
  2. Some folks mentioned how the new strategy may be too disruptive, which I Like-reacted that response on Facebook but didn't really alter the document since it was working hours by that point. I was still following the discussions as they occurred, but trying to focus on my work.
    • I might have been considering altering it later that night to be merely "participate and share the document, discuss why we're still upset with the IFPA, but do nothing disruptive", but I might also have fallen for the fallacy of having sunk too much into the idea of "this is a protest, it should still be slightly mechanically disruptive".
    • However, I never did end up making these changes, as the entire strategy would become moot/washed as spelled out below. As such, the document linked and summarized above has been untouched since the time it was posted to the Facebook Event.

I sent one more follow-up to Andy at this point (total message count 4, plus the one from November that was instantly blocked), just to check in before I sent a follow-up email to Enterrium's GM to keep up with the new strategy in the afternoon:

I haven't had the opportunity to have a meaningful chat with the IFPA or PSL yet. They actually redirected me back to you, which is hardly conducive to, as you put it, "find a different way to handle [our] current situation with the IFPA outside of the business."

It almost feels like they want this protest to happen as an excuse and scapegoat to move over to Pinball Capital after they open in April (early enough to host PSL there), but that's mere speculation unless PSL has an existing contract/agreement of some sort to hold its tournaments at Enterrium that they would want out of early given how there seem to be fewer and fewer machines by the month in the pinball area.

However and to that end, in the interest of keeping the folks who would've attended my event safe, I've decided to cancel the protest tournament. The PSL event will be able to proceed without worrying that any of the pinball machines will be blocked/occupied by another group.

On the off chance that you happen to know, how did Enterrium corporate discover this tournament before I canceled it?

Sorry for the inconvenience and have a pleasant day.

Yes, my "5% chance that feels more like 50%" (due to stress) thoughts did get into this email. However, the GM almost immediately replied and never acknowledged it, and with the hindsight from me now writing about this in August and PSL has still been hosted at Enterrium all these months, it was clearly an unfounded worry. Well, at least the "attempt to move PSL to Pinball Capital" part.

Anyway, the GM replied with the following, though I've condensed it to the main bullet points:

This ended up semi-confirming another thing about Facebook that I had been pondering but hadn't mentioned until now: from what I can tell without having an account with such access, owners/managers of locations of businesses probably get notified whenever an event is tagged with their location, or GMs like the one that was at Enterrium could search for "Events tagged at [location]" to help support or intervene as the need arises (valid). Given this theory, I immediately replaced the location with something more generic.

For a few short minutes, I wondered if maybe the GM was lying in case he saw through my intentional, fully truthful word choices. I quickly got some confirmation from some of my confidants, and then from Enterrium's own Facebook page, that that was also unfounded, and that they really were pulling the plug for the month of March.

At this point, I felt a major weight lift from my shoulders. I no longer had to worry about organizing. I no longer had to worry about conflict. I no longer had to worry about other types of daydreamt consequences like being trespassed or the like. I felt freed!

Was I disappointed that all the plans effectively went to waste? At least a little bit, sure. But I do not thrive in that environment of leading/organizing/managing something, or at least not when there's a high potential for conflict. I want people getting along or respectfully competing, not fighting! I want to be fair and just, and for others to emulate that!

However, I'll get very vocal about people being unjust and unfair. That's what started this entire thing back in November. That's what had continued this issue through and into March.

It's not yet time to move on from March, though...

Andy's post, the second instance of keeping/posting weird receipts

Later that day, right near the end of working hours, Andy made his post to the PSL group on Facebook.

In it, he started off listing pretty much what Enterrium's own post stated: that tournaments are canceled for the month of March, which included PSL. He also mentioned the Grievance Letter as a "PDF document detailing the protest and the demands the group has of the IFPA". I knew that they were merely suggestions that would help appease my community and the OBX victims and maybe repair the relationships since November, but labeling them "demands" like I somehow was holding him and the IFPA hostage is frankly absurd.

He went on to claim that he's "just Andy" and "not the IFPA". I will grant that it's mostly Josh who "is the IFPA", given that he's the only person on tax documents for the organization and my earlier points about all decisions generally needing to go through him, but Andy is a rather tenured member of the IFPA Directors. He also runs two monthly tournaments and all of the major, non-Expo events in Chicagoland like Illinois Open States, Silverball Super Social/Showdown, and PAPA, which is a fairly decent measure of some degree of power. I can't say with any amount of certainty how much he wields now or then within the IFPA proper, but given more recent events, you can't claim to be both "just Andy", someone with no power over anything, and also "a leader" with the ear of that organization's president.

Andy then got upset about people calling him homophobic and transphobic, claiming he's the furthest thing from any of those. There're many things going on with these terms, and there are many ways to tackle these claims, such as this blog post surrounding such claims in pinball, but while some folks may have said it about him, I was still adamantly only calling out Andy's and the IFPA's actions at the time. The former often considers the labeled person to have very little hope for redemption, the latter callout/call-in tends to have higher hopes that the person merely made a mistake or few and needs course-correcting to varying degrees.

A true ally would apologize and listen to being told that an action they took was transphobic or at a bare minimum harmful/hurtful, and strive to do better to not repeat the action. Transphobic actions can vary in severity not just objectively but also subjectively.

It should go without saying that my scale here is for people who don't go as far as directly committing felonies against us (though the intentional deadnaming example is pretty close to inciting them to happen, but I'm not a lawyer).

Returning to Andy's post and the aftermath, though: he linked both to the Grievance Letter (with the v1.0 protest strategy at the top and article sources just below that before the Grievance Letter itself) and the Matchplay tournament at the end of his post.

Because my name was literally right there as the Organizer of the Matchplay tournament, and given that the tournament was no longer being held (both because we were planning on just participating in PSL and because Enterrium pulled the plug) and that there is more information in the Grievance Letter & Protest Strategy document than can fit in the Matchplay tournament's description, I canceled and deleted the Matchplay tournament.

Andy apparently saw fit to screenshot the page and post it into the comments and edit it into the main post. Once again, without redacting the name, despite throughout the post itself, only ever referring to me as "the organizer". This is now the second time that Andy or the IFPA have posted things without considering the consequences of posting names without redacting, and also the second instance of what feels like weird "receipt"-keeping.

Many people tried replying to the post, pointing this out in very reasonable terms. Any such post that was in any way negative towards Andy or the IFPA was deleted, often leading to them being blocked from Andy's personal account. He eventually made a comment and added to the main post:

Also to make it clear, the PSL isn't your platform to air out your grievances with the IFPA, with the same talking points I've seen everywhere else online. Take it somewhere else. People posting stuff along these lines will have comments removed and will be removed from PSL for repeated attempts.

This was merely for pointing out that the same mistake from November's 3rd Kineticist article covering OBX, with the unredacted names, was being repeated here with the one instance of my name in the Matchplay link/screenshot. He kept removing essentially anything negative on his post, only leaving the comments that expressed condolences for the venue canceling March tournaments, praise for being a leader, or incredulousness at people wanting to protest him.

Final Direct Message to Andy

Sometime after his post had been live for a few hours, I sent Andy one final, parting DM (making a total of 5 direct messages in March plus the one comment that got me blocked back in November):

Well, the results of today were certainly not desired for either of us.

However, I will say it's not very classy to try to claim to be keeping "the organizer" anonymous and then publicly, through your larger platform, linking to and screenshotting the Matchplay event that has my name in plain text.

The document has all the same details since Matchplay's description space has so few characters allowed, so nothing new is added by including the Matchplay event, let alone pulling the same mistake that led to a handful of former Women's Advisory Board members receiving death threats. I'm hoping I don't receive the same for this careless mistake that rests squarely on your shoulders.

You may not be the IFPA, but you are its most accessible and public face. As you can see in your post, people look up to you.

To use that power and privilege instead as a cudgel trying to bat away concerns towards smaller fish, especially in the political climate we live in, is frankly disappointing.

Did Josh or the rest of the directors even take a look at the grievance letter? That's an action you can take as a "just Andy" leader!

Anyway, I wish we could've worked something out. But by the sounds of things and particularly these reactions, the IFPA isn't really a place for folks like me.

Good luck in the future. Peace out.

Of course, in hindsight, using "I'm so disappointed in you" language is not particularly useful in attempting to shame someone if the person you're saying it to doesn't reciprocate the same level of respect. 🤷‍♀️ He re-blocked me after receiving it without sending a response.

Aftermath

I eventually joined the Chicago and Worldwide Belles discords to verify to onlookers what my friends had been relaying there in my stead up until I joined. I also clarified a few points. I received some thanks for the attempt and some commiseration over Andy's handling of things with his announcement and... "curation"... of his comments section.

Folks kept reaching out to me to check in with me over the next few days because of my name being clearly visible (if small) in the screenshot Andy posted. I thankfully never received any harassment like some OBX victims and a handful of the Women's Advisory Board members had.

On Tuesday, I went to a tournament to debrief with a lot of the Chicago folks who had supported my attempted protest. It was good to see them in person, and I had a decent enough time.

In the next couple weeks, I heard from a handful of folks who read the full Grievance Letter whose minds were changed about how the IFPA had been handling things since November. That and folks expressing their condolences to me about how it didn't shake out like I had planned, and the continued checking in to make sure I was feeling alright.

I still attended the non-IFPA tournaments and the league events that would've been held at Enterrium at their makeup locations.

On the topic of Pinball Super League attendance

I've mentioned (and will continue to mention throughout this piece as well as in the Grievance Letter) numerous times how PSL has had significantly reduced attendance starting in December. I had been and continue to be suggesting that it's an indicator for how many people are upset with the IFPA's decisions. I wanted to lay out the numbers here real quick, which include dates all the way until this post is being written, not just as far as the story has gotten up to this point:

Month Attendance in '24-'25 Attendance in '25-'26 % diff
Dec. 78 39 -50.0%
Jan. 105 65 -38.1%
Feb. 99 62 -37.4%
Mar. 85 45* -47.1%
Apr. 91 54 -40.7%
May 85 35 -58.8%
June 80 57 -28.7%
July 74 41 -44.6%
Aug. 90 41 -54.4%

*: This was a backup IFPA event held by another competitor and set up within a day after Enterrium pulled the plug on pinball tournaments for the month of March 2026

April through July 2026: A building depression

But looking back, I think I was already starting to feel a bit numbed emotionally within a few days of the protest failing for the most part..?

In these months, the IFPA continued bringing on more sets of new Directors and largely not implementing any new meaningful policies. July brought in a new announcement (or at least sneak preview on Tilt Forums) about changes for WPPRs next year (2027) and some new requirements to make Pingolf a more valid tournament structure in the IFPA's eyes, but also nerfing events that normally host multiple Certified tournaments (a specific grade of tournament as laid out on the IFPA Pinball website) in the same weekend (which people have pointed out significantly affects YEGPIN; it doesn't affect restricted-entry events like Women's).

And I kept going to all of my regularly scheduled events: board game nights, regular non-IFPA pinball, family stuff. Things that I could consider semi-"obligations" to maintain some modicum of regularity.

But my enthusiasm for many of these things kept slowly, slowly dwindling over these months. I stopped streaming to my Twitch channel. I stopped participating in a lot of my favorite discord server's regular community events.

It got so bad that it started affecting my communication at work to the point of a written warning. All because of pinball, and the injustices my friends and I consider its leading, competition-focused organization to have allowed if not committed against us.

Some pinball exceptions

I did still end up going to three one-off pinball events in this timeframe, in addition to most of the regular events that I attended prior to the protest attempt.

Pinball Capital's Grand Opening

I went to the grand opening of Chicago's newest pinball location, The Pinball Capital. Sporting over 100 machines and being about as close to me time-wise as Enterrium, it seemed like a promising place (still is a very amazing place). Also, the very first night of opening weekend was a Pinball: The Man Who Saved the Game viewing party with full catering, and was the only night that had non-IFPA events.

Andy happened to be there. After the movie, he seemed to just spend most of his time blowing up James Bond; I think I saw a score in the 10s of billions the last time I looked? I was disappointed because I wanted to play Monster Bash, but that was right next to Bond and I didn't want him lashing out or blaming me for interrupting his flow or anything more than he already had in March, so I did my best to avoid him.

Overall, though, I had a good time. I played a number of games that I hadn't had a chance to really play in Chicagoland, both older and newer; the catered food was yummy; and the movie is always a joy to watch. It was even more of a joy to watch as a group of pinball people!

Pinball at the 'Zoo

This was a Best Game style of IFPA tournament held in Kalamazoo, MI, but a decent portion of the money was going to a local charity. Also, I had a friend that I wanted to meet from my favorite Discord, and I knew that some of my friends from Chicago were also going to be there.

It's also only like 2-3 hours or so from Chicagoland, and I saw that some of my other friends who visited last year shared a lot of pictures that eased my concerns of traveling to someplace I didn't know how safe it would be for me, as a trans person (granted, with blending privilege both vocally and visually, generally speaking), to travel to.

I was surprised to find out that apparently, Andy ended up showing up here, too. Once again, I avoided him as much as I could, which meant that I mostly ended up spending my entries on the Women's bank, especially when he volunteered to do scorekeeping one of the nights on the Open banks. I also left a queue once when he had gotten just in front of me on a game between refreshes of the Neverdrains app.

There was also an instance where I realized he was behind me in a queue right as I walked up to the machine. As soon as the scorekeeper had taken my score, I kept my head down so I didn't have to look at him and escaped over to the women's area again.

Aside from these "interactions", I had a pretty decent (if muted, emotionally) time at PatZ. It felt good to get the highest score for the weekend on Elvira's House of Horrors in the Women's bank, live on stream no less! That (plus a handful of other great scores) got me into the finals brackets, where I lasted into the top 8.

I also had fun seeing some more unique modded games, some rarer, older titles, and a closer look at the homebrew section, and my first plays on Turner Pinball's Ninja Eclipse (the line for Winchester was too long). I also had a few first plays on a Pokemon Premium. And then getting invited to an afterparty was also a pretty cool experience. As was all the local food places I tried! So much good food!

Pinburgh

Firstly, when I take the trip to and from the Pittsburgh area, I drive that distance. Solo. It's about 7 hours of road time, plus an extra 1-2 hours of breaks (including one meal), with rather simple directions for about 6 hours of that trip plus some slightly more complex bits at the end points. I mostly do it because I don't have a passport (and likely can't get an accurate one these days), and REAL IDs sound like a pain in the butt to schedule w/ the DMV, so air isn't really viable. I'm also not a fan of how the current administration gutted Air Traffic Control in 2025 and how quickly that resulted in bad things.

It's long, but every hour or so taking a break to stretch and update my friends and family (and get updated if there are conversations going on) helps.

Anyway, Pinburgh itself was an IFPA event again this year. I was on the waitlist at around slot 19 day of, but I managed to get in as the first person off the waitlist. If I didn't get in, I would've participated in Bash and Gauntlet, where all or a lot of the money from it goes to charity, as well as volunteering some hours to help run both of them, until the Women's International Pinball Tournament (WIPT) on Sunday.

I ended up in C Division (bottom 1/3rd after day one), but I made finals within it! I got knocked out the very first round of finals, but it felt somewhat good to have made finals in such a highly competitive area. Then for WIPT, I improved over last year by 2 points, but that was still 1 point shy of making the finals this time around.

Nothing particularly bad went down there. There was maybe some mild awkwardness/jealousy feelings on my end because of my friends' relationships dynamic and feeling a bit like an 8th wheel (I might be miscounting), but I got through it and adjusted to their dynamics. Not in a "I want to be part of their dynamic" way, but just in a "I don't have something like a significant relationship for myself and I'm almost 40, but I'm also probably demi and skim past such things in stories that have them" kind of way.

Post-Pinburgh: A terrible capstone to an otherwise awesome weekend

Overall, still, I had a great time, I even got a couple sessions of board gaming in throughout the weekend (I bring a huge bag nearly everywhere that I figure might have some amount of downtime and where I know people might be interested). But, my depression kicked back in on Monday as I was parting ways with folks and realized that we didn't really take a photo as a group.

I also had a very, very ugly cry about an hour into my return drive as I crossed over into Ohio. I've driven through such ugly cries in the past and thankfully it was a relatively straight section of road and relatively low-traffic when it occurred, so even though I was bawling and sobbing the worst of such "parting ways from close friends" ugly cries, I was hyper-focused still on the road and got through it.

About 2-3 hours into the journey, I got a text from ComEd saying "your power is out, we're investigating". This was when Chicagoland got hit very strongly at the end of July by some nasty storms, including the tornado that did a loop-de-loop and hit one house twice over the duration that it was on land. Then, when I was about an hour or two from home, my sibling got home from work and said "hey, the power's out".

I eventually got home, and we still had no electricity, which triggered my depression even more. Almost all of my preferred activities are tied to having power, and especially work since my company is remote by default (unless you're within an hour, I think, of their HQ), but also how I stay in touch with friends is very tied to using electricity. This especially applied to the friends that I was missing strongly having just left Pittsburgh without saying "Until next time" to half of the entire group.

I ended up having to go to the library the next two days to charge up all of my things and try to do some modicum of work. Work was understanding of my situation thankfully. We didn't get power back until Thursday morning, the day after my first therapy session with my new therapist that I'd finally scheduled the weekend before Pinburgh. My sibling and I had to toss about one entire, large grocery run of ours each worth of food from the fridge & freezer.

August 2026: PAPA 23 registration & ban

So, on Aug. 1st, given that I've been sort of reintegrating w/ events that happen to be IFPA but support good causes or enable me to see more of the friends I've gained in pinball, I decided to register to play in solely the women's event that will be at PAPA 23 to be held at Pinball Capital given its work with a charity for suicide awareness. I had also already asked for at least the Friday of PAPA off w/ PTO through work in the following week and gotten it approved. I didn't want to participate in anything besides women's because I didn't want to play in tournaments directly handled by Andy.

However, on Aug. 7th, I noticed that my credit card emailed me that I had received a sudden $50 credit/refund from "International Flipper". I had to dig into my spam folder to find an email from someone calling themselves "The PAPA Admin Team" and email handle "PAPA Directors".

That email laid out that I was banned from PAPA for the following:

It is extremely obvious that the "volunteer PAPA staff" in reference is Andy Bagwell, which completely downplays his role as an organizer, IFPA Director, and tournament director, all of which fall under the umbrella term "leader"/"person in power" which requires a higher level of scrutiny and responsibility.

To top off the email, "The PAPA Admin Team" included two attachments:

To say that I and many of my friends were incensed at this clearly retaliatory move would be putting it mildly. If the reaction to Andy's post in March that included a screenshot with my name had my friends reacting at a 3-5/10, this had them all at a 7-9/10, by my reckoning.

Reaching out to event staff

I tried reaching out to a pair of event staff that I knew handled various things at last year's PAPA event. Primarily, it was to see if they were already even aware or not, since I didn't know who all was involved in making the decision. Effectively, this was also an attempt to appeal the decision that stated it was "final" with people who I thought I trusted and who I had thought had mostly already heard my side of the story without knowing how much pull either had.

I'll be leaving both of them anonymous, same as pretty much everybody else in this story besides the relevant IFPA leaders.

One of them responded almost immediately, stating that they had only found out the day before (Aug. 7th) from the other of the two I had contacted and was too shocked to understand the reasons behind it. They followed up with me 1:1 stating that they were sorry that this all continues to be BS.

The other of them responded the next day and reported that the decision from the event organizers was final and would not be reversed. They made a typo in their message, saying that I "didn't respond [to]" the IFPA instead of "didn't respect" that wasn't fixed until the evening, which made this response feel like an even greater injustice was being done against me since it felt like nobody on the IFPA side of things was willing to really listen and I was thus also being punished for "not being willing to chat" when they (or at least Andy) were the ones blocking and banning me without hearing my side of the story or any true, good-faith appeals process.

Given that it was a typo meant to be "respect" instead, it lessened the pain of the response a tiny amount. I wasn't being additionally punished for being basically incapable of having a chat. It still hurt, though.

This novelette-length post, research, and one last random Andy appearance

I felt very lost. I didn't really know what I even wanted to do about this, because the things I truly wanted were apparently not realistic in the eyes of the IFPA in some cases, and objectively not realistic in others.

During this time frame, through my friends & contacts, I found out that PAPA is a license on loan/contracted to the IFPA from the Replay Foundation, but every PAPA event post-pandemic-shutdowns is essentially handled purely by IFPA and support volunteers. PAPA social media is controlled by the Replay Foundation, and the only person who can truly call themselves a "PAPA Admin" or "PAPA Staff" is the head of the Replay Foundation, not the IFPA and supporting folks running PAPA 23 who were the ones who sent that email above.

I've also heard some things about what the supposed evidence supporting this decision contains, particularly surrounding me "harassing and misrepresenting" Andy. I hope that everything I've laid out in this entire post makes it clear that this evidence is a misrepresentation of me, that I'm speaking 100% of my truth (except where it could identify someone who is less relevant to the story or who I still extend some amount of respect to) and that the ramifications surrounding the OBX Incident and the IFPA's OBX Decision continue to have reverberating effects, especially in the queer and true ally pinballer communities across the globe.

To top things off, at a very recent Belles tournament, Andy ended up showing up seemingly randomly at the venue (I've heard he happened to be in the area, which is believable if inconveniently timed; it's unlikely he knew Belles was being held). He seemed to me to be rushing around a fair amount, but I continued to keep my head down and focused mostly on my round 5 game on Transformers. The fact that he was there rattled & intimidated me, though, even though I had already also tested another "5% chance thought" the other night to verify "no, he does not have the power to ban me from the venue itself" (outside of the context of PAPA 23) ahead of this Belles tournament.

I was later informed that he was apparently videoing a spot or taking photos to plan for the upcoming PAPA 23. I did see him stopped near the exit for some reason, and I have (probably "5% chance") theories of what he was discussing. I don't know if I happened to be in any of the footage, which I imagine would be upsetting to him given how I've been banned from the event, though I imagine that his footage probably managed to avoid me despite me playing a game for the tournament I was in right then that happened to be right in the main path.

Anyway, I still managed to get second on Transformers despite my feelings surrounding Andy being there, which helped secure a place in the finals. I ended up knocked out in the semifinals, unfortunately. If it weren't for Andy showing up and incidentally rattling me (I'm 99% certain he was there in order to video the spot, not to harass me), I might've had a more overall positive opinion of the day.

Paths forward & Boundaries

These are not calls to action. I AM NOT REQUESTING OR DEMANDING ANYTHING OF ANY OF YOU. However, if you feel like you want to do something that can improve your levels of hope, here are my suggestions, and some boundaries I'm laying down:

Strictly no more IFPA for me

Barring any meaningful changes that the IFPA might make in the future, I will no longer be participating in, nor attempting to participate in, anything that will submit to the IFPA. If you fail to advertise that your tournament is IFPA and I show up only to find out about that after the fact, I will leave from here on out; no more "sunk travel cost". I'll say hi and then bye to the friends who stick around, and then head out.

I used to have an exception for if the tournament had close friends running the event or was for a charity in part or in whole, and as long as friends or people I wanted to meet up with in person for the first time (ever or in a while) were gonna be there. Not anymore.

PRPA, unaffiliated, or dependingly, any other sort of competitive pinball organization that may have already or may eventually crop up, all of these I'll participate in.

But not IFPA. And not anything where I might have to face Andy. If my reaction to seeing him at Belles wasn't any indication, his behavior and the fact that he holds such power and influence makes me feel unsafe, even in inclusive settings.

Overall, I don't think the IFPA is the way forward for competitive pinball anymore. Not while there are leaders in the organization that seemingly see banning and otherwise ostracizing me and others (not for PAPA; at least there aren't any banned from PAPA besides myself that I'm aware of) as acceptable losses essentially for our speech where we're trying to stand up for the injustices enacted on ourselves and our friends.

(This isn't to say that folks shouldn't be banned from tournaments. I'm merely suggesting that I believe my ban to have been instated over bad-faith reasons.)

NO HARASSMENT

If you feel like this story changes how you feel about the pieces in play, especially if it's related to how the IFPA is running the PAPA event, don't harass any of the organizers. I repeat: DON'T HARASS THE ORGANIZERS.

If I find out that you've harassed them and the evidence is credible, you'll receive one final chance (which is more than I received surrounding this ban from PAPA 23) to make your case before I unfriend you and give you the cold shoulder at events. I won't be unpleasant or crass, I'll just largely not acknowledge you except in the ways necessary to participate in said events.

Also, this is not a slight against PAPA, the Replay Foundation, or the LFS S***ide Awareness charity. This is strictly on the organizers running PAPA 23, which is mostly IFPA tenured leaders like Andy and Josh.

If you feel like you wish to refund your tickets and "vote with your dollars & feet", make sure to re-donate the money directly to 988, and maybe match a donation over to Lambda Legal Illinois or the Transgender Law Center. I am NEITHER asking nor demanding you to do this. I do NOT control you; you're all adults capable of making your own decisions. I will not begrudge you too much if you participate in PAPA as run by the IFPA as far as this year is concerned.

Let us all just play some hecking pinball

This is a bit more of a direct request. Support your local pinball places. Support those of us who feel ignored by or ostracized by the IFPA (WITHOUT HARASSING IFPA PLAYERS, TDs, OR HEADS).

Pinball itself did nothing to anyone! Maintain your joy for the game! Have some good fun! Run and/or play in some non-IFPA tournaments! Some folks are even going to be holding PRPA end-of-year finals for their scenes kind of like IFPA States!

And remember:

"The future is whatever you make it, so make it a good one!" - Game Over callout from Back to the Future, Data East, 1990

Just because my game with the IFPA is over (barring meaningful organizational & policy changes), doesn't mean I won't continue putting credits/tokens/quarters into pinball and competing outside of the IFPA structure.

#IFPA #OBX #injustice #pinball